It’s painful when your family won’t help. But one day, you may be able to look back and think it was for the best.
4月 26, 2026菅原隆志29 min read
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I wanted to write this article because there are people searching with the keyword “my family won’t help me.”
First of all, it’s painful when your family won’t help you. I was raised without help from my family, too. It’s not that I was never helped at all, but there were only a countable number of times, and when things were truly hard and painful, instead of helping me, they attacked me. So the feeling that I could never ask for help or rely on anyone became almost like a belief, and before long I got to the point where I couldn’t even go to the hospital. Even when I later became so unwell that, looking back, it was enough to require emergency hospitalization, I told no one (only my partner knew), and I spent months struggling alone, working hard to recover. I have had many other experiences as well, so people like me who have no experience of being helped probably become people who cannot rely on others, and for some, relying on others may become painful and unbearable. This is only my case, but looking back now, I can say, “It was for the best.” It is not a memory of an unpleasant past. I was lonely, it was hard, and it was painful, but I know there were benefits that matched that suffering, so I can see it as a good part of my past. In short, I couldn’t rely on others easily, but because of that I always relied on myself, thought things through on my own, and solved problems as much as I could by myself, so in that sense I developed strength. That’s why I can see it as a good experience, and even if I could redo the past and choose a “life where I was helped,” I probably would not choose it. I value it that much. If you are suffering now because no one is helping you, I don’t think you can feel this way, and it’s only natural that you can’t. I couldn’t feel that way back then either. But over time, as I understood that I had gained strength, I began to see the connections and could come to think it had been a good thing. So I’m not telling you that you need to feel that way right now. What matters now is to help yourself as much as you can, and of course there are people who can help you, so if possible, receive help while moving your current problems toward a solution. Then, later, if you understand how much strength you gained by helping yourself, I think you’ll be able to look back on the past without becoming pessimistic. One day, you may come to think it was for the best. If you can feel that way, your resilience will also grow, and I think that’s wonderful. I wrote down what I suddenly wanted to tell you, but I also want to share something even more useful, so from here on I’ll use ChatGPT to create the article. Please continue reading.
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